Turning Point

Blog Theme: Turning Point

During the past week I have had several realizations that I would say mark a turning point for me here at Nkosi’s Haven. While I approached this experience knowing that I would encounter people on a daily basis who are living with and have come from harsh and challenging situations this manifests in unexpected ways. While the work being done here at Nkosi’s Haven is remarkable and many of the mothers and children have access to care and opportunities that they would not otherwise complicated problems still exist. One of the largest questions and challenges I have struggled with recently is “how do you help people who do not want to help themselves?”

Studying international development at York, one of the largest debates is surrounding help -- how to help people, what kind of help is most beneficial and whether one should even be ‘helping’ as it can be more harmful than helpful. Here at Nkosi’s Haven an ongoing struggle is how to empower or motivate the resident mothers to want to better their own lives.

When I first arrived here, after a few days or weeks I began to form ideas of how things could run better, especially in regards to the mothers and their overall lack of willingness to contribute to the community. I would like to clarify that I am by no means trying to lump them all together because many have rose from very challenging situations to contribute to this community and to move on to other places. However, despite being given many employment and other opportunities the majority of them seem only be willing to perform the bare minimum duties (cleaning common areas, working in the kitchen) and spend the rest of their time sitting around.

This lack of willingness to grab opportunities to improve one’s circumstances is one that I struggle to understand and accept. I am not ready to believe that these women should be given up on but I am unable to propose how values such as self-confidence and self-motivation can be instilled in someone who appears to have given up on themselves.

While I would consider this a negative conclusion, it has made me realize how exceedingly complex and complicated this issue is and how little I know. This to me reflects the basic problem of “experts” in the development world -- highly trained and paid professionals that are brought into a context for a short period of time, usually several weeks or perhaps months, and relied on to provide advice and guidance to a project.

In addition many of the empowerment and employment opportunities offered here that have failed are those that have worked in other contexts. This adds to the development theory that one project that functions in one situation cannot simply act as a blueprint for another situation. In the context of Nkosi’s Haven I have only began to see the cracks in the surface of this very complex situation where initially I thought I’d seen problems and how to solve them.

Pictures!

Here are a few more pics of more adventures I've had.

This past weekend I went to a game reserve called Rhino and Lion park. It was a really neat experience, I saw lots of animals I've only seen in movies before and I got to pet a tiger and a lion cub! Here I am with the tiger cub.

The other weekend I took a bicycle tour of Soweto, a huge, famous township nearby. The trip included a lunch at a local restaurant where we had kota, a township staple. Kota is a quarter loaf of bread hollowed out with chips (fries), atchar (mango pickle) as basics and other ingredients (in this case ketchup, cheese, egg and polony).

This is a picture of a street in Soweto.

Recently a few friends and I took a trip to a nearby nature reserve where we saw wild animals like donkeys!

Here is a view of the nature reserve from above on a sewer pipe we walked out on.

Through Someone Else's Eyes

For my third themed blog I have chosen the topic: See yourself through someone else’s eyes. During my time here in South Africa I have had lots of experiences where it is very obvious that I am not South African. Despite South Africa being a country filled with many different types of people, if I am not assumed to be a foreigner due to my skin colour it becomes obvious as soon as I speak.

For the purposes of this blog entry I am going to focus on how I think that I am perceived by the residents of Nkosi’s Haven. Nkosi’s Haven regularly receives international volunteers (at the moment there are 14 here) so the residents are no stranger to Western/white people but as a volunteer one is an eternal source of interest.

I believe that the kids see me as someone who is almost always happy to see them, someone who will always give them a hug and pick them up. I think that the children see me as somewhere between a friend and an authority figure (certainly more towards a friend based on the number of times my warnings are ignored). The some children certainly also feel that either because I am white or because I am from Canada that I am rich and therefore should buy them things or give them my things. This is a perception that I have thus far completely rejected as I have never bought an individual child anything as I believe this creates materialistic bonds (as seen in other cases here). I plan to make a donation to Nkosi’s Haven as a whole upon my departure.

As for the mothers living at Nkosi’s Haven it is much more challenging for me to see myself through their eyes as they are harder to get to know. I think overall the mothers see me, and other volunteers, as someone who comes and goes but since they know I will only be here for a fixed amount of time it is not worthwhile to become more than acquaintances. At least I think this is how I would feel were I a resident here. However, I think the mothers also see the volunteers as a source of knowledge and a resource, particularly related to technology.

One example if this is recently I had a mother, Happy, come to me asking me to help her activate her Facebook mobile (Facebook on your cellphone) and a few other programs. For me this would be a simple process but for her first we had to create her first email address, then a Facebook account and then use this information to activate Facebook on her phone. Going through this process and explaining each step to her made me realize how complicated technology could appear when you have not been very exposed to it. I heard the next day that she was up all night chatting on her phone so I guess it’s working.

Overall my experiences here have made me really consider my place in the world and how I am seen by others, living in Canada for my entire life has made me accustomed to having people assume that I am of a Canadian background (which is an accurate assumption) but here I am asked almost daily where I am from and subsequent questions. Being the minority has been a very interesting experience for me and I’ve learned a lot from it so far.

English-English Translation

Being here in South Africa I have encountered a variety of amusing and seemingly unique uses of English words, as well as many other languages. Definitions are based mostly on usage that I've observed (List to be updated as I encounter more).

South African English = My definition

geyser (pronounced 'geezer') = water tank ... no idea why

robot = traffic light

valet, shouted at parking attendants while in a parking lot = "I want to park near the entrance to the store"

Howzit? = "What's up?" "How are you?"

sharp, typical reply to 'Howzit" = good, okay

Vienna sausages = hot dogs

takkies = running shoes ... this one doesn't make much sense to me

braai = barbeque (this is really an Afrikaans word I think but it's always used in English)

just now = sometime in the semi near future

now now = sooner than just now

bakkie = seems to be a pick-up truck

doing sport = this isn't something I picked up from South Africans but rather the Germans I live with - they use it to mean "getting exercise" or "working out", I love how it sounds. Eg. "I'm going to do sport today"

For a much more comprehensive list check out Wikipedia's page on South African regionalisms

Independence

Gate in Berea.

For my next themed blog post I have chosen: Something you now appreciate that you didn’t before. For me there are tons of things that I now appreciate more than before but the most significant thing that I definitely took for granted is independence. For almost the last two years I have lived in my own apartment with my friend near York. While in Toronto I can literally do whatever I want whenever I want. This doesn't mean that I do - it usually just leads to lots of late nights doing homework but the potential exists. Yes there is danger in Toronto, I am aware of it and I take care but the level care is totally different from here.

Johannesburg, and South Africa in general, has a reputation for high levels of crime and my gender and race make me in particular a target. This means that I have almost never walked alone outside of the fences of Nkosi's Haven and I don't go anywhere alone at night or on foot. This might sound very limiting and at times it does feel that way but most evenings are spent hanging around with the other volunteers and I don't mind too much.

The next aspect of independence I took for granted in public transportation. The TTC might not be the best transit in the world but compared to mini bus taxis it is a breeze. The mini buses are certainly interesting and I'm glad I have been able to take them but I would not want to rely on that form of transit. There are times in life when you don't want your trip somewhere to be an adventure. Most frustrating for me is the total lack of any signs. You want to find out which bus to take? You have to ask. Want to know the fare? You have to ask. Want to know where to get off? You have to ask. And you can never be totally sure the person you're asking knows where you mean and is giving you the right answer. This would definitely get easier the longer you lived here but it can also be rather frustrating. The other limiting aspect of the mini buses is most don't run past when it gets dark and it's not advisable to be travelling on them past dark any ways. Next time I start to complain about the TTC I'll try to stop and remember how it would be if I needed to rely on a mini bus.

The third aspect of independence here is the gate. As a result of South Africa's high crime rate almost every house and business has a fascinating mix of fences, spikes, bars and gates. Here at Nkosi's Haven we are able to keep the gate open during the day as the area is pretty safe but it is locked around 7pm. So if you want to go out of the gate after that you need to get the key, unlock the gate and lock it again. If you're coming back later than 7pm you also need to call the nurse (who keeps the gate keys) and have her come and let you into the gate. All of this can take 10-15 minutes of messing around at least.

This might seem like a relatively negative post but I really do now realize how much freedom I have in Canada. To me the most negative part is that people are so desperate that they feel they must resort to theft and violence. And that this results in people being so fearful of theft and crime that they need to surround themselves with fences. Realistically these issues have not been a major source of frustration for me, they are inconvenient for sure but I'd rather be safe than sorry as the saying goes.

More Pictures...

It's another public holiday today - Youth Day, which celebrates the beginning of the student riots in Soweto in 1976 protesting education only being offered in Afrikaans. Holidays seem to lead to trips to the mall and blog posts for me. Here are a few more pictures...

There seems to be grass fires on the edge of the freeway on a pretty regular basis here and no one gets too concerned. But one day there was a fire in the nature reserve RIGHT across the fence from Nkosi's Haven!! (The building on the right is one of our cottages.) Us foreigners (me and 3 German volunteers) were, I think, legitimately concerned since there was fire, right across a fence. After much running around someone did call the fire truck and the fire went out on its own but the lack of concern about fire was very interesting and somewhat concerning.

The next 3 pictures are of the other site that Nkosi's Haven operates in downtown Joburg, I had the opportunity to visit it the other week and it is a really neat place. It is made up of 2 houses that are very patchwork and they have the most adorable chef who made sure we ate the entire time we were there.

This is one of the houses.

Me standing in their courtyard type area.

The Nkosi's Haven logo painted on the wall at the entrance.

Define Beautiful

Hello Everyone.

Part of the reason for this blog’s creation is my internship’s requirement to write a blog entry once every two weeks on specific predefined topics. While I have been writing on here fairly regularly I haven’t written any entries on these topics. So here is the first one. Topic: the definition of beautiful where you are. It has been challenging for me to narrow down how to define beauty here at Nkosi’s Haven as there is beauty in something as simple as making someone laugh or having a baby fall asleep in my arms but here goes.

What defines beauty for me here at Nkosi’s Haven is singing. On the evening of June 1st there was a memorial service held here to mark 10 years since the passing of Nkosi Johnson. The service featured several speeches, a bible reading and singing by the Soweto Gospel Choir, all the children of Nkosi’s Haven and several mums and caregivers. Every time I experience the children, mums or caregivers singing or dancing it amazes and captivates me. Prior to the service in the morning, with just Gail (the founder of Nkosi’s Haven) and those of us living here lit a candle in memory of Nkosi at 5:45am, the time he passed. As we walked into the room where there was a memorial set up for Nkosi the children sang one song that almost made me cry.

I expect that it is a fairly well known song but since I am not religious and most of the songs sung are gospel songs, this was the first time I remember hearing this song. It is so simple but so beautiful. One of our caregivers, Sarah, began by singing “We walk” and then everyone else answered with “in the light of God, the light, the light of God” and then the song continues from there, though that simple lyric made up the majority of the song. The swell of voices and collective passion was very powerful touched some deep part of my heart. As I write this and try to reflect on how much this song and moment affected me, I am having trouble expressing how I felt in that moment and I certainly don’t feel that this description is doing the beauty justice.

In comparison to my very privileged life many of these children lack the basics that I took for granted growing up - enough clothes that fit properly, two parents who are together, a room of my own, more toys than I could play with - yet many of them have such incredible talent for singing and dancing with little training. And to me this is beautiful. Of course there are also many times when the children are not nearly as perfect as I’ve presented them so far - they don’t say please and thank you nearly as much as they should, they hit each other, grab, and ignore your attempts at discipline. But overall there are many more beautiful moments here than ugly ones.